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Tuesday, October 1, 2013

This isn't the Life I Chose...But I'm Strong Enough to Live it

 
It has been a crazy couple weeks and I am finally able to update this. I am currently on break from nursing school and resting before having to go back to the grind next week. I have had quite an eventful break.
 
Last Tuesday, I was hospitalized and diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. This means that my pancreas no longer produces insulin and I have to inject myself four time a day with insulin and monitor my blood sugar. It was hard to receive and process the news that I will be permanently insulin dependent but I know that God only puts you through what you can handle so I am trusting him.
 
I am still adjusting to "counting carbs" and changing my lifestyle but so far I am doing okay. I can still have sweets and eat some of the things that I love but I am trying to get my sugar on a normal range before I venture out. In the hospital, your environment is so controlled. Meals are made especially for what your body needs; carbs are within limits and sugars are low. Once you are released, you realize how hard it is to make meals with carbs within limits. It is much harder than it seems to eat the right way and keep your blood sugar low. There have been days that I have cried, gotten mad, and realized that I no longer life carefree.
 
So what has changed? A lot! My day begins with checking my blood sugar as soon as I'm out of bed. A normal sugar reading is between 60-100; when I went into the emergency room last Tuesday my sugar was 624. I was shocked, scared, and had no idea how serious everything really was. Even though I am nursing student, I really didn't want to face the reality that I knew was coming. After I check my sugar in the morning, I have to administer my insulin and make breakfast. My current diet is 1800 calories with each meal is between 30-50 carbs and my snack are from 15-20. Its harder than people think to keep meals within the carb limit; meals have been pretty basic like chicken, veggies and rice or half of a potato. I am determined to get my blood sugar numbers down and under control. I have to test my sugar before each meal and administer insulin through an injection to my arm. At night, I inject a different type of insulin in my belly, this is the one that is painful and harder to get used to. I never thought I could inject myself but its actually become really easy.  
 

 
 
Currently, my numbers have ranged from 152 (my best ever!!) to 270. I am continuously learning about new ways to cut carbs and about new foods that will replace the high-carb foods I used to love. Diabetes is a disease that I refuse to let win and I am determined to get healthy. I have had so much love and support behind me, people have been so amazing!
 
So this blog has gone from one about love and my journey through nursing school to one about my battle with diabetes and how I will juggle it all. With the right support system, I know I can do this.
xoxo Allie